Moe's Funeral Feb. 9,2010

Hi Friends-
this will be the final post from me regarding this blog. Whether you were at Dad's "Celebration" or not, I will be filling you in on what happened before his service and my personal thoughts on the day. If you were at the funeral, parts of this may be redundant, but I want to put closure on this blog and thank those of you who let me know that they actually read it! I thought there were just 4 of us! :-)

Picture this: Dad passes away Tuesday evening at 7:07 p.m and his body is removed from their home around 9:00.
Wednesday morning mom calls the Mortuary for an appointment to set up the service and preparation of dad. They do not have an appointment until Thursday morning, so in the mean time we begin discussing the service, who will speak/share and what we thought Dad wanted for this special day.
Aunty Chiyo is assigned the Caterer, and we begin talking about the program, etc. At this time, we are hoping Rose Hills has Saturday available even though we know the chances are slim-
Thursday morning, Gregg, Joan, Mom, Rev. Mitchell and I meet at Rose Hills to go over the plans.
We are told that there is a very strict time limit for the chapel we wanted so we talked about using another facility- Evergreen Baptist Church is one suggestion. By God's grace, Joan was able to speak to the secretary and get the time and date we wanted. (Side note, I knew that I wanted the service to happen as soon as possible, but I felt physically resistant to the availability, like I really didn't want the finality of Dad's funeral so soon, even though I knew it was better. Mom later said she felt the same way.)
After we nailed down the date and time ( a 4 1/2 hour meeting) we raced home so that I could grab a bite to eat and return to the Mortuary with Dad's discharge papers from the Marines so that they could request the Honor Guards.

When I returned, I went with mom to order flowers and get that taken care of.
While we were thinking about the program and pulling Dad's old pictures someone mentioned how nice Ruby Miho's program was, with pics of the family, etc. I think Mom asked Joan to call Darryl and he came over that night with his friend Ken, took many pics and created Dad's beautiful program for us!!! It was awesome! Thanks, Darryl and Ken.
We did feed them well before they left and had some laughs, too.

I think we had decided that Gregg, Joan and I would also share some personal thoughts about Dad. We promised we would all keep it short and upbeat- I hope we succeeded. We had two days to come up with something for Dad...how do you condense 45 years into two pages, 14 font?

Friday I got the call from Rose Hills that the Honor Guards would be there and of course, I cried. It meant so much to Dad to be a Marine- he was so proud of that and I knew that was one of his wishes. Meanwhile, Joan, Gregg and I are still working on our little talks....

Saturday we arrive at the church and there are people there already standing outside! I wasn't ready to look at anyone yet. I didn't want to start crying before I even walked into the church, but it was inevitable. The Service Coordinator was there, and most of our helpers for the day were already there. Mom was doing pretty good- but I think Joan and I weren't sure how we were doing.
Russ was also there and I could tell he had already been crying. His eyes were puffy and his head was down when we were walking up to the chapel. He was going to give Dad's history as well as a personal eulogy. He had know Dad longer than anyone of us kids and he and Dad had other experiences than we had with Dad. They were close and this was difficult for him, I know.
When the Honor Guard walked out of the sanctuary, I lost it. I met the Senior Officer and thanked him for coming ( tears were included for free). He said that it was his pleasure to serve us and that Dad deserved it for serving our country. Wow......that was humbling.

Before our family went into the chapel, Rev. Mitchell gathered us together to pray over the day and to bless our family, then we proceeded into the chapel.

The program was changed because the protocal for having the Honor Guard there is that they are first, then we followed the rest of the program. It was surreal for me. I've attended my share of funerals, usually sitting 5-10 rows back watching the service and the family. To be in the front row of this funeral was strange, dad in the casket was strange and the fact I couldn't see everyone behind me bothered me.
Russ spoke, Aunty June spoke, both doing amazing jobs, then our turns came. I know we were all nervous and we actually were able to hold it together pretty good. The rest of the service was also truly awesome. Eileen sang "The Prayer" song and Rev. Mitchell tied Dad's reoccuring "7s'" into his meditation and prayer. I loved it and appreciated the work that Rev. M must have put into it. It was very personal and applied directly to Dad's life and passing- THANK YOU REV. MITCHELL!

When the service was over and people started coming to hug us, it was surreal to me. Most I knew, but every person came by to offer a hug or condolences.....I was exhausted by the time we headed over to the reception.

I aplogize to anyone who I did not get to say 'hello" to. Some of my girlfriends had another funeral to go to and I realize we got there an hour after everyone began arriving.

The food was good but the company was better- it was neat to spend time connecting with everyone there. Some people we haven't seen in many years.

When we finally went home, I had nothing left. What a strange feeling- overly tired and overly exhausted!

We came back on Sunday and I had even less energy than Saturday...but it was nice to spend time with Dad's sisters and other family members. Maybe I am rambling because at some deep level I DON"T want to end this blog because that is finalizing Dad's passing- his death and his new beginning. I have an emptiness in my heart- Dad took a piece of me when he left and I want it back. I bet everyone is feeling a little of that too.

I love you, Dad and will have that empty place in my heart until we are reunited again- it is saved just for you.

Jan